What I swore I wouldn't do.......

I swore I would never blog. Couldn't see the point. Who exactly would read the witless rantings of nothingness I was sure to post about. I also swore I'd never use the words "because I'm your mother, because I said so and bees knees" Apparently I am a liar.

Shockingly this doesn't bother me. I love to write always have and hopefully always will. From the time I could pick up a pencil and legibly put together letters from the alphabet I have been writing. Now to be fair it has never been anything terribly deep, grammatically stunning or profound. Mostly fiction, fan-fiction, and my most favorite smut. Knock your socks off -find a lover smut but still non history making smut. I'm good with this too. Frankly I've come to the point in my life where I don't care if anyone reads or particularly likes what I write. I do it for me it. It allows me to empty my mind, I take out what runs through my brain and put it down on the paper. The metaphorical paper that is because yes I use a computer, usually I write on Microsoft word however the trial period of Microsoft office long since expired on my laptop and not having hundreds of dollars to buy an actual full copy I am stuck with word pad (gag) or google docs. Whatever.

Of course I say I write but the writing only happens when I have time....as if. I have four children, two dogs, a frog that does actually exist; only you can't see because the tank is murkier than Swamp Things abode, an amazing husband, I home school, help out my mom, am participating in a training for the awareness of those with disabilities and of course I am a stay at home mom. When I'm not in my car that is.

Which brings to mind the flaming yellow Suburban sitting in my driveway. I loved it for a long time till I bought it. Then I really liked it for quite some time. Now of course I have discovered the drawbacks of such a noticeable vehicle, no anonymous road rage, no wondering if the cop confused you with another vehicle as you sped by, and you never have to wonder if that's really my truck at the adult store. On the plus side I never have to wonder where I parked. EVER.

So to be fair the spare time I do have (really you shouldn't laugh so hard) is usually devoted to something that does not tax the mind. Currently my addiction is Roller Coaster Tycoon 3 platinum. Thank you very much Samantha for reminding me just how much I love this game. As time wasters go it is by far one of the better ones.

So why am I blogging? Maybe because I've decided my to do list just isn't quite full enough, more likely because I've been recently identified as an "expressive" which supposedly means a love of conceptual thinking and ideas but a dislike of detail oriented work. For anyone confused it really means a magnificent procrastinator who gives could talk. I'm sure Freud would have a field day with that but I'll worry about it later.

Truly I just felt the need to put out there into the land of nod (trust me at some point while reading my rantings you will nod off) the life I live.

I love my life and I say that without the slightest trace of sarcasam. I have a husband that truly is my knight in shining armor and my kids are fantastic. Three girls and one boy are my idea of perfection. Ranging in age from 13 to not quite 2, yes I have my handsfull and my heart too.

Sounds idyllic? Not really, idyllic doesn't generally involve a stack of bills, medical debt, a child experiencing disability, babies that don't breathe and an anxiety of bugs that requires medication. But I'll take my life over someone else's any day of the week.

Kind of makes you wonder doesn't it?